The same, old story, I thought our relationship was solid and we were just having some minor problems with communication. I never saw the signs of the demise of our love affair that I can so clearly see now that he’s gone. ‘What is it? What’s wrong? What can I do to help?’ I actually thought that, if we could just talk about what was bothering the both of us, with the love we felt for one another, we could fix whatever was wrong. Only, I found out later, after I made a fool out of myself, that I was the problem. I was his problem. The problem was me, so he said. ‘You can’t make your heart feel something it won’t.’ I told him that I needed something from him to show me that he loved me. I needed him to give me a sign to make me feel wanted and loved, at least that, at least give me that much. Instead of coming home, flopping on the couch, and turning on the television, I needed him to talk to me. I needed to know about his day. The time he spent away from me, counting the time he. I read it over several times, making minor revisions, until I was satisfied it didn't sound too awful. I copied it onto fresh sheets, tore them out, and I trimmed the edge with scissors, just like Kayla had done. I knew she would notice I had used the same kind of paper as she had. It was something I knew she would see right away, and it felt like the right thing to do. I dropped it into the outgoing mail slot in the lobby of my dorm, less than twenty-four hours after I had gotten her letter.Another bridge to rebuild. I had a lot of them, and each one required a lot of work. I hoped I had the stamina to bring it all off.A couple of weeks later, we were in the showers after a long practice. We were leaving the next day to head over to a weekend tournament in Jacksonville, and Pick had been working us pretty hard all week to prepare for it."Hey, Porter." Jesse's voice came to me through the steam in the shower room."Yeah?" Have you got your summer clinics set up yet?"Oh, shit. I had.
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