And I hadn't evena single time gotten to wear my new sweater with which it all began.##On Friday morning the little pill reminded me that I had to go to thepsychologist again. The usual daily routine was that I was to changeclothes right after school."Mom, do you think I can go to the psychologist as a boy?" Why would you?" Otherwise I have to come here to change and it is in the oppositedirection." Hmm, it would actually be better for you to go as a girl, becausethat's how they know you." But I can hardly do it and get there on time." Can't you change at school?" Mom! I just can't let anyone there see me as a girl!"As was not to be expected otherwise, she sighed. But she didn't sayanything. After some thought she said, "Maybe it's not a bad idea at allif he were to see you as a boy. Then he'll have a better picture."I didn't like the idea of being seen there as a boy. But I had no bettersolution. Other than to change someplace, and for that I'd have to dragalong the clothes all day.. I get paid a hell of a lot of money to play a kid's game. The least we can do is to take it seriously."It's bad enough to play well and lose. I don't find anything wrong with being beaten by a superior team. That's not what happened today. We played lousy football, against a lousier football team, and lost. We flat-out lost this game. If I were a fan of the Arizona Cardinals and I came into this locker room right now and saw this crap, I'd be a fool to spend another dollar on this franchise."In just a few seconds I had managed to accuse my employers of condoning a sub-standard effort, accuse my teammates of being perennial losers, give the Redskins fodder for our next game and accuse the fans of being idiots for providing money to pay my exorbitant salary. I had shot from the hip and hit everything in sight. I knew before I got out of the shower I had done something really stupid, but there wasn't a writer around to allow me to clarify my remarks.What I said was the truth, though..
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