And I found myself thinking about it more and more. I started watching my friends at school more closely. Watching my female teachers more closely. And looking at my mom, her friends, and especially Margie in a completely different light. I took a new interest in how shirts fell over breasts, how jeans and shorts hugged asses, bangs hung around cheeks and eyes. There was no denying that I was now interested in girls. Only a week or two after that night, witnessing Margie and my mom, my desire for women was in full flame. The funny thing is that I was deathly afraid of what my mom would think. Although she herself was a lesbian, her parents didn't know and it was something that she didn't tell anyone. It was a total secret. She talked to me and Sara about finding boys, marrying, having k**s, stuff like that, but never gave us any clue that she was a closet lesbian. I know she would never have wanted her parents to find out, and she was someone who cared a lot about. You're table was empty and I..." I sent the girls home without me," she said. "They insisted that we all drive home together, but I told them that I felt like living dangerously." What do you mean? Do I look dangerous," I asked."I don't know," she said, "are you?"I didn't tell her at the time, but I had a hard-on that extended easily beyond my knees and toward my ankles! She exuded sex, but not in a silly, contrived way; she was demure, sophisticated and incredibly sweet. I asked her out for coffee and we went to my favorite 24-hour hangout and drank coffee and talked for the next two hours. We talked about everything from her daughter to her failed marriage to her dreams and aspirations. Then she asked about my life and my relationship with Doreen. I told her that even though I liked Doreen very much, I didn't see us in a long-term relationship. It seemed like we were together mainly because of our relationship in the band. And I didn't say that just to hit on her; that was the.
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