”Say thanks to dorsetmike‎ for the following.Three old men walking side by sideFirst: “It’s windy today”.Second: “No, it’s Thursday”Third: “So am I. Let’s go for a beer.”What goes across a lake at 100mph? ... A motor pike and sidecarp.I used to love farm vehicles, but not anymore - I’m an ex-tractor fanI was frantically pacing outside the maternity ward today.Just so everyone thinks I’ve actually had sex.Husband and wife are waiting at the bus stop with their nine children.A blind man joins them after a few minutes. When the bus arrives, they find it overloaded and only the wife and the nine kids are able to fit onto the bus... So the husband and the blind man decide to walk. After a while, the husband gets irritated by the ticking of the stick of the blind man’s he taps it on the sidewalk, and says to him, ‘Why don’t you put a piece of rubber at the end of your stick? That ticking sound is driving me crazy.’ The blind man replies, ‘If you had put a rubber at the end of YOUR stick,. Even on the block of stone that supported the base, there was the faint outline of a ball sack"Straddle it," I told her."I can't, it's a listed monument," she said."Go on, I won't tell," I said.She sat astride it and giggled; I slid my hands up under her skirt and pulled her knickers off. She rocked back, then pulling the hem of her dress up, she sat down on the cold stone phallus.Lisa froze for a moment; her eyes took on a distant look. I too moved forward. Her gaze seemed to take me in but not recognize me.I pulled my cock out and started to roll a condom on it. All she did was stare; it was as if she had no notion of what I was doing. Some deep, almost primordial desire was overtaking me; for a moment I considered ripping the condom off and impregnating her womb, but I left the sheath on.We both fucked trance-like, an animal passion. I cared only for my prick in her warm hole; she only responded when I thrust deep in her body.She leant forward and seemed to mutter 'Dominic' to.
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