It’s okay, Carol. I’ll be okay someday.’ He let her off the hook again. And: ‘I’ll always be grateful to you, Charlie. You taught me how to love. If it wasn’t for you, I’d never have been able to be with Larry.’ ‘I’m glad you’re happy, Carol. But who’s ever going to teach me?’ ‘Someone will, Charlie. You just have to keep looking.’ He let her off the hook again. ‘I am.’ It was nice when she showed that she cared: but in the end, he found that it didn’t matter much. When he hung up, she was still gone. He did look. He slept with more than several girls, it was the early 70s, after the Pill and before herpes and AIDS. Sexual freedom was a very real thing, and he got his share of pussy, but in his heart there was still a big empty space shaped like a girl named Carol. He masturbated often, to magazines and fantasies, he began to smoke marijuana, because it made the pictures seem real and enhanced the fantasies. But he avoiding masturbating to his memories of her. They were still. If your lover is a woman, be totally present with tender gazes, loving words and affectionate touch.A man’s body is built so that first comes sexual flow, then emotional openness. For most men, overtly sexual touch quickly opens their heart when it is closed. But a woman’s body is built so that first comes emotional openness, then sexual flow. That is, most women don’t want to open sexually until they are first open emotionally.For masculine essence-men, energy opening comes first, then emotional opening. Such a man often needs to feel pleasurable, sexual energy flowing - his woman’s hair against his groin, her lips on his neck, her nipples brushing his thigh - before he is relaxed and attracted into life enough to want to open emotionally. The masculine is not at home in life and body, and therefore must first be attracted into the flesh before being willing and able to commune through the heart. For feminine-essence women, emotional opening comes first, then energy flows. Such a.
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