I was deprived of that; except for a brief visit about a year afterwards, I never saw her again. She died. Rachel and I were soulmates. I knew that, I think, before this. But I only truly grasped what I lost when I lost it. I loved her manner, her nature, her sense of humor, her view of the world. Her cute accent, her way of cutting through the world’s bullshit like a hot knife through butter.She was so genuine, so honest, so true to her beliefs. We could have- should have- spent the rest of our lives together laughing at the joke that was the world. I was ready to give up the charade of not wanting to be with her all the time when we met up in Wichita. That’s the reason I asked her to marry me. I believe, to this day, that she ran because of the sex we had- and misinterpreting my proposal as being part of that.If it wasn’t for Kelly I would have likely died not long after Rachel did. I would have taken my own life. Reliving the chain of events that lead up to that moment was like. Scott and I had to steady each other as we brayed like jackasses. After a few moments, our laughter subsided and Scott and I adjusted our towel wraps and composed ourselves. Paula looked at us quizzically. "I hope you two didn't close up the hot tub when you came in?" she asked. "Actually, we didn't," I responded. "Does this mean we're headed back out?" "Of course," she said, smiling. "I only called you in to tease you a little, and maybe give the impression that you both were in trouble." "You mean we're not?" Scott asked with a smile. "For what? Polishing each other's towel racks?" she said, her eyes darting back and forth between our poorly concealed hard-ons. Momentarily stunned by the joke, Scott and I looked at each other from head to toe before bursting out laughing again. I couldn't resist slapping playfully at Scott's cock through his towel. Paula stood up from the couch and took us both by the hand, steering us to the patio door. She paused for a moment, letting go of my.
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