."But I looked good enough when you wanted to fuck,you butt-ugly bastardly hypocrite schmuck!"And then I beheld in the mirror above me,a scene straight from the X-Files! (w/ David Duchovney)I was shrinking and turning a much darker hue,my dick and balls shrivelled my boobs grew and grew!And when that mysterious glow did subside-"Oh where did my weenie go?" I cried, cried and cried.I wailed, "Whatchoo wanna do me like dat fo?Oh lawdy lawdy, I'se a nappy haired Ho!"She smiled, "We'd agreed that free speech was fine.Well when I said that spell I was just practicing mine."Words can't hurt people, isn't that what you said?So now come and meet your new pimp, Memphis Red."So that's how I wound up out here on this corner;My life's just a blur now of backseats and boners.Cruel ethnic slurs can be jolly good fun,until you insult a center who's skilled in Vodoun.I used to be famous for venting my spleen,before I ran afoul of a B-ball voodoo queen.I'm a pure sex machine, my profile's obscene,a. One of them I recognized as the girl who I’d seen walking alone a minute earlier. She was shouting and clutching her handbag which the other figure was trying to rip from her. His silhouette was beefy and broad and he was trying to stifle her screams. I looked up and down the street frantically but no one else came, she was in serious trouble. I knew I had to do something. Without stopping to put on shoes or a coat, I rushed out of my room. I’m on the second floor of the building and I raced down the staircase, covering four steps at a time and almost falling over. I crashed through the double doors and stumbled into the street. I knew I would have to attack the man, but I’ve never been much of a fighter and my only advantage was surprise. The rain soaked my t-shirt and water seeped through my socks to chill my feet. The man had now produced a knife and was brandishing it furiously at the terrified girl. I knew that I may well get stabbed but I couldn’t sit by and watch this poor.
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