I was newly turned fifteen andwanted to see what all the fuss was about concerning these things I had heardso much about on TV and on the internet. I had saved up enough money from thegenerous allowance that my parents gave me so that I could afford one.Not having a credit card was a major stumbling block however, as it ruled outthe possibility of a purchase via the internet. I was going to have to go intoa shop. I plucked up the courage one Wednesday afternoon, and skipped P.E.lessons to visit the local sex shop. I was almost immediately challenged aboutmy age by the girl behind the counter but I produced my fake ID (somethingno underaged girl should be without!) and that seemed to satisfy her. I wentto the vibrators and had a good long browse. In the end I chose two – asimple cheap vibrator that was just a plastic stick, and a fullon 'rabbit'stylevibrator, with beads and a twirling end and a clitoral attachment. I hurried home and was very wet by the time I made it into my bedroom. " Great idea! Get it stuffed and stick it in my purse, and when someone tells me to 'go fuck yourself' I pull it out of my skirt, lift my skirt, and do it. That or get it pickled and exhibit it at the Tate Modern for a million bucks." Geez, I wonder if Hallmark makes a card for this occasion, like 'Sorry you lost your dick but glad you're now a chick' seems appropriate." We both began giggling hysterically."They bury animals don't they?" Samantha questioned. "I think I should bury my dick." No, no, let's slice it up for cocktail snacks! By the way, the proper way to say farewell to your private anatomy is to make sure the doctors keep you awake during the procedure and after they have snipped it and are lifting it away with the crane start your most heartfelt rendition of 'I'll be seeing you.' I don't even know what dysphoria means. Is that the opposite of euphoria?"And Samantha," I continued, "aren't you just a little concerned about penis envy? And don't you.
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