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"Halt, Earthlings or perish," she commanded while extending her arm like posing for the Heisman Trophy. "I am Queen Vulva. We have already captured your men and have them working in our Viagra mine." Cheers could be heard from afar. "We need more male labor which is why we are commandeering your spacecraft. Plus we need males for propagating our race." More cheers from the bowels of the mine."But, Queen Vulva, how do you speak our language so fluently?" Ripley asked.The Queen explained, "For years we have picked up signals from your various media outlets: CNN, NBC, ESPN, and YouPorn."I remained full of questions. "But, where are YOUR men?" We have no living men. We fucked them all to death after binge-watching PornHub," Queen Vulva clarified to which our three male crew members came rushing into the room demanding citizenship. "Besides we do not need men for companionship. Our tongues can unfurl to the length and girth of an Earth python." Now it was Ripley and I who begged for. I can understand your need for an open relationship. I have no problem with that. But it has to work both ways, I have to feel free to have sex with anyone that I want to too. Open relationships have to be a two-way street. Is that Ok with you, Debby?" "Oh, sweet Jesus…yessss! Maybe I could even watch sometimes. The thought of watching you fuck another woman is turning me on. Maybe we could even share our bed with another girl or another guy on occasion. God…I love you." The doorbell rang Debby’s twin stood there looking up at me. She didn’t have a twin sister. What she had was a fifty-four year old mother that could pass for her twin sister. People that didn’t know them personally were always mistaking them for identical twins. Hell, if they wore the same hairstyle, fixed their make up the same way, and wore identical outfits; I wouldn’t have been able to tell them apart. She definitely didn’t look her age Christmas morning as she stood before me in her Little Elf costume. Barbie,.
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