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“Hi” said Mandy, carefully avoiding using his name, not sure if he was Woody or Woodrow at home “you haven’t forgotten you said you’d show me where the orchids are?”He looked confused, then daylight! Orchid – as in a name for the female genitalia – “Ah yes, I had forgotten, sorry. Give me five minutes” He dashed upstairs, scared that while he was gone, Mandy would say something that made it obvious they weren’t looking for plants. Ten minutes later he was down in jeans and lumberjack shirt, his dad looked and mouthed ‘really?’. His son was no natty dresser. Mandy and his mother were sharing beauty tips and drinking coffee. He waited patiently and finished his drink; then they left.“Tony”“Yes dear?”“Put your tongue back in. She’s your son’s girlfriend”“How? Why?”“Who knows? And I know she’s got a lovely bottom. But if you don’t stop ogling it as it wiggles down the street with our son, I may find it unnecessary to suggest we go upstairs”Like a dog trained to salivate at the sound of a. "Let me see her ideas, Brittany."Vicky grabbed the magazine and looked at the pages that Mike had foldedover, as she would constantly glance up and down at his face."So did you have anything you really wanted?" said Vicky, half laughingand half serious. "Or is that a stupid question under thecircumstances?." I want to crawl under a rock maybe!" said Mike, sulking."Nonsense, you are really naturally pretty. Trust me, you are a modelnext to a few of the drag queens I?ve made look hot," said Vicky. "Ok,here?s what I think. I looked at the pictures of the actresses? hairthat you liked, but the problem is that your hair is not as long asmost of them, and we really don?t have the time for extensions likethat. Jessica Simpson, Carrie Underwood, and Beyonce have really longhair, and you don?t. This one picture of Scarlett Johansson could work,but it?s way too platinum for you. You are thinking like a typical guywho loves really long hair, and it?s not what you have. For a guy, yourhair is.
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