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Always had, figured I always would. My wife is only a year older than me at 44, but I had always gone for older. My first time at the age of 20 was with a 35 year old woman, and they had only gotten older from there. I was a nerd, a study guy, and did well in school and had gotten my pharmacology degree and later gone on to work with Merck. I had been a nerd and socially awkward in high school. Never had a girlfriend, let alone a lover. I never thought much about it, and never cared much. After all, older women were skilled, and patient and wiling to teach. I figured, who cared that I had never gotten any when i was young. Then I got married to Amy and got a job more toward the executive level and not so much in the minutia. We moved to the suburbs when I was 37 and we had a kid the next year. Amy was right on the edge of age for a child but things went through fine and we welcomed our own little boy Jerry Jr. to the world. Next door to us were Sam and Kathy, and their little girl. Your doing wonderful things in the quest to destroy the long, sad, shameful racist history here in America---by something much more powerful than any set of laws could ever achieve. Keep it up, babe! ]My wife passed away some years ago. Her death was one of the most difficult, and painful things I've ever had to go through, and for a long time I lived single, trying to be a good parent to our daughter, as best as I could do, and that kept me busy, most of the time, but in those lonely moments at night, I was so very sad; and for a long time, I thought that this sadness would never go away. I'd loved my wife very much. I had assumed that our relationship would just keep on going, but life is full of surprises. So, I settled in to live the life of a single father, and make the best of what life still had to offer.Nevertheless, the lonely ache never really left. It hovered over me like a cloud. I tried not to let on to my daughter that I was lonely. I didn't want her to feel as if I was.
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