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’ ‘And?’ I asked, already having an idea where this was going, though as I was about to learn, having an even greater impact on me that I realized. ‘Obviously, he did, which I only found out about today. I wondered why Steve wanted to see me in the middle of the day, what it was he wanted to talk about, expecting more pressure from him about the other thing. But that’s when he told me that he was breaking up with me, because he had in fact found someone else, and that they had already done what I was obviously unwilling to do with him. ‘Who was it?’ I asked, already having a sneaky suspicion by the look on Kathy’s face as she looked at me. ‘Darlene,’ she said softly. My break up with Darlene had indeed been a difficult one as well. She had been the first girl I’d really cared about, but strangely enough, it was I who wasn’t yet ready to have sexual relations beyond the a-typical petting and fondling which we had done together. She wanted more, not just the sex, but a commitment of. I'll fuck you as long as I damned well pleae you cold bitch. This is all you are good fo, so shut up, and take my meat, and LIKE it, slut!" I'd think to myself as I dripped my sweat, spittle, and sperm on and inside my wife a second time.")In reality I knew she wanted me to leave her alone when we were done, but I'd caress her clit, and fumble with her ass like an amateur until she'd ask me to leave her pussy alone in an exasperated tone. She had to say the words like a good litle girl. She had to ask me for permission. It was just our little ritual, a joke between lovers. Staying inside her longer than I was welcome gave our sex a spicy, rapey flavor that I enjoyed.Beth knew another child would ruin her career. By the time I put a condom on, and she added some spermicide, the spontaneity, and romance was usually gone. Add in the fact that she was mentally and physically exhausted most of the time and well, we just began to drift apart. Over time, the rape fantasies were all I had.
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