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“Miss Jones” he said finally “It seems quite obvious to me that, until today, you have never had an eye examination”.A hunter was rushed into the emergency room with a bear trap clamped onto his testicles. As the horrified doctor was examining him, he said “Man, how did this happen?” The hunter explains that he was out in the woods and felt the call of nature. Bending down by a tree, the bear trap was triggered and snapped shut on his testicles. “Oh” exclaims the doctor “The pain must have been excruciating!” “It was” said the hunter. “The second worst pain in my life”. “Second worst? What could have been worse than that?” “Coming to the end of the chain” said the hunter.Mary, despite her good looks and charm, had still never dated any boys at the age of 19. Today she was asking her aunt Martha for advice with boys. “Aunt Martha” she started “I’ve just started French kissing Tommy and I need to know where the spit should go. I don’t want to dribble on my boyfriend”. “Swallow”. Her. .December 8 - 6:00 PMIt started to snow.The first snow of the season and the wife and I took our cocktails and sat for hours by the window watching the huge soft flakes drift down from heaven.It looked like a Grandma Moses Print.So romantic we felt like newlyweds again.I love snow!December 9We woke to a beautiful blanket of crystal white snow covering every inch of the landscape.What a fantastic sight!Can there be a lovelier place in the whole world?Moving here was the best idea I've ever had!Shoveled for the first time in years and felt like a boy again.I did both our driveway and the sidewalks.This afternoon the snowplow came along and covered up the sidewalks and closed in the driveway, so I got to shovel again.What a perfect life!December 12The sun has melted all our lovely snow.Such a disappointment!My neighbor tells me not to worry- we'll definitely have a whiteChristmas.No snow on Christmas would be awful!Bob says we'll have so much snow by the end of winter, that I'll never.
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