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After dialing an 0891 number from anadvertisement entitled “Hear Me Moan” the caller wasplayed a tape of a woman nagging her husband forfailing to do jobs around the house. Consumer Watchdogsin Dorset refused to look into the complaint, saying,“He got what he deserved.”___ From The Daily Telegraph in a piece headed“Brussels Pays 200,000 Pounds to Save Prostitutes”: ___“ ... the money will not be going directly intothe prostitutes’ pocket, but will be used to encouragethem to lead a better life. We will be training themfor new positions in hotels.”___ From The Derby Abbey Community News: ___“We apologize for the error in the lastedition, in which we stated that ‘Mr Fred Nicolme is aDefective in the Police Force’. This was a typographicalerror. We meant of course that Mr Nicolme is a Detectivein the Police Farce.”Q: How do men sort their laundry?A: “Filthy” and “Filthy but Wearable”.Everyone talks about apathy, ... but no one does anything about it!Failed in business... 1831Lost. ‘Get off!’ I shouted raising my other hand in an attempt to prise him off me. My plan didn’t work, and his other hand gripped tightly around my other wrist. ‘Stop being a twat!!’ I shouted louder. I hopelessly wriggled my arms around in an attempt to get free but it was useless – he was too strong. He took a step towards me, forcing me to take a step backwards. Unaware of how close the bed was behind me, I stumbled backwards and fell onto it, swiftly followed by him. He landed flat on me, but his grip never loosened. I could feel his abs pressing against my chest. ‘If you weren’t a girl, I’d beat the shit out of you.’ He said through gritted teeth, his face barely millimetres from mine. ‘Like the fact that I’m s girl would make any difference!’ I shot back. He seemed slightly hurt at his and loosed his grip so that I could prize free one of my hands. I hit his arm as hard as I could but it made no effect. He didn’t say anything, just looked down at me. ‘Now, get off me!’ I said.
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