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She rolled her eyes and told me things like, "leave her alone", "I'm not fuckin you", and "Fuck, leave me." I just sat there sippin my drink, truthfully I couldn't move, I was too afraid of a scene being made. Then she said,"I'm hurtin, you wanna help." I said yes and she explained how everyone she loved left her one way or the other. She just lost the love of her life yesterday and she didn't wanna be alone tonight, but she didn't want to let anyone near. I couldn't say something gentle or supportive cause I couldn't think, I told her to grow up, nothin last forever, not even love, and if this has been the first time you lost a love that means you've loved before so move on. I changed th subject and started telling stories of my life, making jokes, and making her hurt her stomach from laughter. I was told if a woman laughs at you this hard then you's a friend and ain't never gonna be nothin else, but I didn't mind, I just wanted to help her. I was almost three in the. Still, the most hilarious thing to do to a drunk is to simply follow them for a few miles, then flip on the strobes. This usually results in all kinds of wildly amusing gyrations, Burnett recalled, both outside the drunk’s car, and in, and if the drunk makes it to the side of the road intact you could almost always count on finding the poor wretch sitting in a puddle of urine and excrement. So, Alan Burnett sat by the side of the road, listening to Lucky Man and checking his rearview mirror from time to time for the loom of approaching headlights when – voila – he heard the mating call…the sustained rumble of tires thumping over BotsDots. He made sure his car’s headlights were off, then turned on the engine just as the suspect car rumbled under the overpass just behind his patrol car. It was a red sports car, he saw, some sort of ovoid shaped Infiniti or Lexus, and the driver was having a really hard time keeping it between the lines. The eastbound highway was five lanes wide here.
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