mp4

But if I was content, I was not really happy, not in the relaxed, carefree way you have when you’re in your twenties. Maybe it’s unrealistic to expect more at my age, but it was nevertheless a fact. I needed some excitement in my life. Particularly where sex was concerned. I truly loved my wife, and we had always had a good sex life. Nothing too exotic, mind you, but a lot of it when we were younger, and just spicy enough as we got older to keep us both interested through our thirties. But as our mid-forties approached, we didn’t seem to spark as often, and I at least felt that something was missing. I had no intention of cheating on my wife. I was sure I’d eventually get caught, and I couldn’t bear hurting her that way but my fantasy life got a little weirder. My imaginary sex was wilder, more abandoned, sometimes rougher, and often featured things my wife and I had never done together, like anal sex, or sex with vibrators or other toys. I jacked off more often than I had in. If my parents reacted with surprise when I told them that I wanted tostart ballet class, I dread to think what their reactions would be if Itold them I wanted to live my life as a girl. My father in particularwould be livid- the way Laura's father acted toward her is proof enough ofthat. My parents already have three girls, I couldn't take their only boyaway from them- especially not from dad.Every time my mum gave birth to a girl, dad would smile and be happy andsay how much he loves his new daughter... But he would then immediatelyreturn to me, indulging me in a kick-about or a trip to see Queen's ParkRangers (his favourite football club) play. Every morning I wake up andsee the QPR poster on my wall, I'm reminded that not only am I his boy,I'm his only boy, and that's all I can ever be.Mum, on the other hand, is very much devoted to her career. Out of her anddad, she's the main breadwinner. She manages a large shop (part of anational retail chain) in Knightsbridge, leaving most of.
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