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“Capital, Champagne all round.” I cried delightedly.“Have it sent up to the Bridal Suite,” I insisted, “I suppose that blaggard Broomstead is in residence there?”“I cannot say sirs,” the clerk insisted. A ten bob note loosened his tongue “Mister and Mrs Smith,” the clerk said, “Mr Smith is a regular but he seems to bring a different Mrs Smith on every visit.”“Slimy looking cove, tightwad, tight trousers, slicked down hair,” I ventured.“Averse to tipping, sir, not generous as per you gentlemen,” the clerk agreed, “Would you care for a pass key?” It cost a damn fiver.We proceeded to the top floor not without incident as the elevator failed to elevate with our entireity aboard so some had to take to the stairs.I opened the door. “Good God Gerald!” Jessica wailed as I walked in to find her abed with Bunty,” What brings you here?”“Two forty five newspaper train from Waterloo,” Algy replied truthfully.Bunty had pulled the bed clothes over his head and could be heard praying.“Had a good. In fact Elaine loved everybody and only had less than kind words to say about two people; the new vicar and Margot. So Alan and Sarah kept the house in Hinckley, Alan found a flat in Preston, coming down for weekends. The strains on them both soon began to tell as they went from a very highly active and spontaneous sex life, to a timetabled one. “I’m sorry Al my love. You’ve been away three solid weeks and on your first day home my mother has invited herself for coffee. I’m really cross with her, but you know how she is. ‘No’ is a word only she’s allowed to use. Look I’ve bought you a bottle of Laphroaig as a treat, and when we’ve got rid of everyone we can get seriously wicked as well.” “It’s alright sweetie, I understand and I promise to behave. Thanks for inviting my Mum too; we won’t be quite as outnumbered. I hope she’s the first one to arrive.” “Oh she will be darling, I asked her to make sure she was here soon after ten. That way she will be well ensconced before Mummy gets.
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