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Never was going to need a third one. Wouldn’t matter, never would have gotten it anyway. By then, I realized what I had to loose and gain. The female lead in my story actually lost everything, and with support, rebuilt it and became an adult. The addition of having a child does that to many, but not all people. The immaturity of the author as well as the female lead was ‘cured’ by a dose of reality. When I was outlining this story, I looked at the female lead ‘falling off the wagon’ again. From who the characters were, it would have ended the story or just transferred it to Loving Wives. If we are lucky in life, we get a second chance. There are very few thirds. Second chances need to be earned. The female lead did that. I also wanted people in the story to have success in their striving. Romance and growth and a future was where I really wanted to go, not the utter destruction of Loving Wives. The world needs more hope, less heartache. The support of family and friends is an. And what's more you're contradicting yourself. Yousaying I'm not Anthony anymore, but that I'm not truly Kimberley enoughto justify myself as a woman. You're confusing the fuck out of meCinders. What would you have me do?" I'm not having this discussion with you now Kimberley. I have to do myrace prep. But you should seriously think about doing the right thingtoday. You know you should." She walks off then, without looking back, Ilet her go in silence.Was she right? Was I a fraud? Was the fact that I'd not lived a femalechildhood or endured a female puberty with breasts budding and bodyconfidence issues and the trials of menarche negate my right torepresent my country as a female athlete?If this is what my lifelong best friend thought then maybe I should heedit.When the race comes I don't approach her at the start, but her face ispretty clear about how she regards my presence. I can't run withconviction knowing she feels that way.I let her win. I let two Queenslanders take the minor.
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