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That evening I go over to Sharon's dull house in that dull village.Sharon invites me in and once I'm in the kitchen she wastes no time incoming to the point: "I know you an' Tina 'ave split up. Probably forthe best - she was too young to get so involved. She told me you're atranny, which I don't find surprising - I always thought you were gay,anyway!" Now, look here," I start to say, but Sharon cuts me off."Nevermind trying to deny it, sissy! Listen to me, for a moment. I 'avea confession. I got you here to trap yow. You see my friend Carol is aWelsh witch. She's given me what's known as the Charm of Making. It canturn a person into another person." What the hell are you talking about," I retort."Look, you don't 'ave to believe me. But you do 'ave to hear me out." Ok, ok," So, what I was goin' to do with the Charm of Makin' was to use it onyou to turn you into Tina and Tina into you. Strikes me, if you wannabe a woman so much you can be her an' I think she could do with bein' alittle. Try to think what madeit special."He shrugged, but after a minute he answered. "I think it was at theorphanage." The orphanage? Lee, you couldn't have gotten a lot of fancy presents in awretched place like that." Of course not! -- All I ever got was a few old toys and some strangers'hand-me-downs." Then maybe it was something other than the gifts. What other people werethere?" Just my pals, and the nuns -- and Father O'Brian." Scarp suddenly smiled,remembering. "Hey, he was a good old bird! If there was ever a priest likeBing Crosby played, it was him. There was this time --" Then the gangstercaught himself and his mood changed abruptly. "Why don't you just get out ofhere?"She wasn't letting go of him. "I couldn't leave you alone on Christmas." Heturned in her grasp and pushed her back in exasperation. "This isn'tChristmas!" Of course it is," she said, pressing her thumb to the center of his chest,undaunted by his temper. "If it's Christmas in here, it's Christmaseverywhere." You.
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