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We had no privacy in our cell.’ ‘So, what are you going to fuck him up the ass, Vinnie?’ ‘Yeah, you know, for old time’s sake. I’ll probably have him blow me first. He’s going back in the joint for a parole violation and I thought I’d give him a bang before he left.’ ‘That’s big of you, Vinnie.’ I had trouble trying to compose my thoughts. ‘You’re not going to blow him are you?’ ‘Nah, I told you already. I’m not gay.’ Vinnie looked down at me. ‘Gees, Freddie, you really are shitfaced, aren’t you?’ ‘Jack and I had a good time,’ I said slurring my words while drinking the last of my drink. ‘Let me know when you two are done. You can give me a ride home. In the meantime, I’m just going to close my eyes and take a nap. Meanwhile, James was already topless. ‘You have tits! Jesus Christ. I’m so sorry, Miss. Fuck. I thought you were a man,’ I said apologizing all over the place. Vinnie said you were James.’ ‘I am a man,’ said James as he pulled down his pants and exposed his erection. ‘I am. See, Dick is into stuff that I'm not into."But I thought it was you who wakes Dick up," you say. (Well, you'd say that if you were paying attention. I know I ramble a little, but try to stay with me. The next dirty story is just ahead.)Yeah, Dick's sleeping until he gets a call from my libido, but once he's awake it doesn't take him long to get off in the bushes. Er, weeds. Whatever.Anyway, he gets into some weird weeds. Places I'd never think about going.Calm down, I'm not going there. Dick's not into dick either. You didn't see an "MM" story code at the top of this page, did you? (To those of you who are disappointed: get your own Dick.)So. Weird weeds.Well, there's Marge in Human Resources. Really nice lady. She's been there since they hired me. Knows all the ins and outs of sexual harassment and inappropriate conduct. And that was before we hooked up. But she's 54 years old and 300 pounds, so most of you don't want to hear her story. I don't really want to tell it. We're still.
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